Kelly and Brian
Hello! From the moment we were married in November 2019, we’ve wanted to add a little one (and ideally, two!) to our family, and take on the joys and responsibilities of parenthood. Unfortunately, for the past 3 years, we have struggled with infertility. Despite being hopeful, positive people, this has been one of the most challenging periods of our lives. The waiting, costs, fertility drugs, uncertainty, and disappointments have taken a toll. After failed rounds of IUI, multiple rounds of IVF, failed transfers, and an autoimmune disease we’ve felt heartbroken and hopeless. But we are not giving up. After talking it over with several professionals, we’ve made the very personal decision to pursue the surrogacy option. We still have two healthy embryos from earlier IVF rounds, and so while this decision was not an easy one, we believe surrogacy is the best option for us to have biological children. We’re choosing to do an independent surrogacy rather than go through an agency, both because it’s more affordable (we’ve already spent a small fortune trying to grow our family as our health insurance hasn’t covered any of our infertility treatments) and because we’d like to build a warm and caring personal relationship with the surrogate.
We’re asking you, or anyone you know, if you’d be interested in being our gestational carrier. Ideally, we’d love this amazing woman to be in the San Diego area so we can be connected with her during the pregnancy. We know this is a huge ask, and it’s uncomfortable to ask for this kind of help, but the discomfort we feel is nothing compared to the joy we’d receive from finding someone to carry our child. If you know someone who might be interested or have a friend who was previously a surrogate, please let us know or have them connect with us directly via social media.
We love caring for our 2 pups. We take them to the park, the beach, local breweries, and to the local mountains in the fall and spring. We are both very close to our families, in fact we live on the same street as Brian’s parents. We both work in the public sector and care deeply about our community. Kelly is into crafting, baking, and remodeling our house. Brian is into wood working, history and convincing Kelly not to remodel the house 😉 We both love to travel, although we haven’t done much of that lately, but we hope to do so in the future with our future children.
- Names: Kelly & Brian
- Location: San Diego, CA
- Number of embryos: 2
- Agency: No
- Surrogate Compensation: High ($35,000-$45,000)
The Biggest Ask Says
The American Society for Reproductive Medicine provides the following recommendations for evaluation of gestational carriers (i.e., many fertility clinics will require the following for their gestational carriers) :
- Carried at least 1 child without complications
- Fewer than 3 deliveries via c-section
- Body mass index in between 19 and 32
- No smoking, abusing drugs, alcohol or prescription medications
- Not receiving welfare, public housing or cash assistance from the government
- Has a stable home life with emotional and child care support
- No mental health conditions requiring the use of medications within the last 6 months (including depression)
- No criminal record
No one likes to talk about surrogate compensation, but it is an important factor in any surrogacy agreement. The following is how we classify high, medium and low compensation (excluding the value of any benefits). Many factors affect surrogate compensation including surrogate experience (e.g., has the woman been a surrogate before?), whether the surrogate is signed up with an agency and surrogate preferences.
- Low = surrogate compensation less than $20,000
- Medium = surrogate compensation between $20,000 and $40,000
- High = surrogate compensation greater than $40,000
You can learn more about how much surrogates get paid in our surrogacy guide’s module: “How much does surrogacy cost?”.
Feel Free to contact Kelly & Brian!
Could you be a surrogate for Kelly & Brian? Sign up with The Biggest Ask for free and start chatting!Contact Them!