The Biggest Ask Forums

Find answers, ask questions, and connect with other surrogates or intended parents across the USA. Register to contribute at



The Biggest Ask forum will be carefully monitored by admin. Users may be asked to re phrase their comments or questions if it comes across as insensitive or harsh. You must be signed in to contribute. Click here to register.

There are two major rules enforced:

  1. Be respectful
    Our aim is to be a place where intended parents and surrogates can get unbiased information about surrogacy in peace. Please refrain from judging others or criticising their choices. Our admin will follow closely and delete any disrespectful comments.
  2. Respect each other's privacy
    Being part of this community requires mutual trust. Authentic and honest discussions will make this forum amazing, but many things said might be private and sensitive.

What's shared here should stay here.

How the Forum works:

  1. Users can earn points:
    • 5 points for starting a conversation that is relevant to surrogacy (limited to one question a day users can ask more questions but they just get 5 points for one)
    • Awarding 5 points for answering a question AND getting a "like". Every additional "like" the person gets earns them 1 additional point.
    • Every week, all users are awarded 5 likes to distribute as they choose. The likes don't roll over so it's just 5 likes a week that they can distribute.
  2. Once a user earns 100 points, we get notified and you'll receive a $100 amazon gift card.
  3. Getting a certain number of points will get you the rank of "experienced surrogate" or "experienced intended parent".


The Biggest Ask Forums For Intended Parents Finding a surrogate

  • Finding a surrogate

    Posted by Dave on March 24, 2023 at 1:36 am

    We’ve been looking all over to find a surrogate and we always seem to strike out. Plenty of people have offered to carry but we don’t have eggs or embryos. It is emotionally tiring/frustrating.

    MaryJane replied 1 year, 2 months ago 2 Members · 1 Reply
  • 1 Reply
  • MaryJane

    March 24, 2023 at 1:40 pm

    hi @Dave yes – surrogacy can be extremely emotionally draining. But it is common to start searching for surrogates only after creating embryos. That is because it can sometimes take years to create high quality embryos and from the surrogate’s perspective, she is just waiting on the sidelines. Since life can change and there is an age limit to pregnancy, the overall norm in the industry is to search for a surrogate once you have high quality embryos.

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