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Hurry Up and Wait
I feel like waiting for the process to get going is taking forever. I know once things get in motion it will be fine but how long has the process taken others once you’ve matched? Our situation is a little unique because the IPs embryos have to come to the US from another country but we matched on June 10th and I still haven’t heard from anyone to schedule my medical screening. The waiting is driving me crazy!
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8 Replies
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I think a LOT of people feel this way! We matched with our first surrogate in February 2020 and didn’t have our transfer until July 2020 (very special circumstance because of covid – but still!). If you want to be a bit more proactive, you can always find out what is driving the bottleneck. Perhaps your obgyn clinic hasn’t sent the medical files over yet to the fertility clinic? If that’s the case, you can call your obgyn and give them a friendly nudge 😉
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I noticed this a lot more with my journey through an agency than with my independent journey. I think with an agency there were a lot more steps we had to go through. Also during my agency journey, I was matched in March 2020 so we also had a big hold up while figuring out what clinics were going to do as everything started shutting down. I’m doing an independent journey right now which has been flying by! We matched in Feb and transfered in April!
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@AshleyWatkins wow – that is so fast! Congrats 🙂 and great point about agency vs. independent. That makes a lot of sense!
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I definitely get where you’re coming from. The beginning stages were a drag for me. I matched with my IPs in December and didn’t get scheduled for Medical Clearance until March. Transfer was 6/20 and now I’m so thrown off by how quickly every thing is moving.
I’m also with an agency so I know where are a lot of moving parts and a lot of people involved. I did like MJ said and just kept asking questions to see how I may be able to help speed things up. But, this journey definitely taught me some patience for sure lol
Sending you so much love on your journey. 💗
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Our situation was a little different, as I am learning many are! We met independently the first week of April, I submitted my official application with their agency at the end of April, and I am just now having my medical screening next week. (In hindsight, three months is actually not so bad – but the screening process had delays directly due an agency issue, so there was an added delay of almost a month.) We have completed everything else, however! (Including legal/psych.)
Definitely do not be afraid to ask questions like everyone else has mentioned. If I didn’t finally look into what was taking so long, we might still be waiting!
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Our transfer was 5 months after we matched and that was going as fast as we could. We had doctor/medical record delays and then legal can take a hot minute too. You’re eighth, it is a lot of hurrying up to wait though! Hang in there 🙂
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“Hurry up and wait” describes it well! This process is also full of unexpected delays and “bumps” in the road that slow things down. I connected with my agency in September, matched in November, and transfer will happen this month. Even so, with a great match the slight delays seem less important. I’ve wondered if, when all is said and done, I’ll look back and feel like the time flew by.
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@RachEliz totally agree that a great match makes all the wait worth it! I bet when you look back it will feel like it went by so fast 🙂 Good luck with the rest of your journey!
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